| shes simple yet confusing. |
[Oct. 24th, 2005|07:33 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  rejuvenated | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Jay Z- 99 problems | ] |
hey there kiddos. im at kristas house right now, and its amazing. she makes us vanilla chai. mmmmmmmm... goodness. kristen's coming to get us at 8, us meaning me and crystal.
im sleeping at sams tonight, as i did last night as well.
werd.
ttyl punks.
<333333 KARIFUL! |
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| i am but one small instrument. |
[Oct. 16th, 2005|10:01 pm] |
another entry for yall.
kyle is taking pics of himself lol.
i fell asleep in last period study and then i got called down to sped room.
fucker.
hands down this is the best day i can ever remember, always remember the sound on the stereo the dim of soft lights the scent of your hair that you twirl in your fingers and the time on the clock when we realized its so late on this walk that we share together, the streets were wet and the gate was locked so i jumped it, and i ket you in, you stood at your door witrh your hands on my waist, and you kissed me like you meant it, and i knew that you meant.
love you all, especially you.
<3 Karahhhhhhhhhh |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 16th, 2005|09:50 pm] |
hey there people. im in study, in the library. these computers suck, because they dont let you go on AIM or myspace, or anything. gay gay gay. fuck my setup, becky fucked it up like whoa.
w.e.
kyle is sitting next to me, sic wit it he says. |
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| reeses in your cereal?? who would have thought!? |
[May. 19th, 2005|05:00 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sick | ] |
| [ | music |
| | The Starting Line- A Goodnights Sleep | ] |
wow, a long ass time since I have updated, but nothing really has changed. I believe in my last entry, I was dating this kid named Mike Flood, well needless to say, hes an asshole, and will never settle with one person, you see, because he is a homosexual.
welp, me and the Joshua are dating again, and things couldnt be better for us. I am completely and truly happy with him. Joshua is leaving for Job Corps on tuesday, im so sad. hes going away to Vermont, and will be there for a year. :( he can come home every weekend, that is, if I go and pick him up, because he doesnt have his crx back yet. I will miss him, alot, but things can only get better for us. *cries*... *cries some more*... ok Kari, just stay strong, things will be okay, I promise!
why do i have this fucking thing, no one is going to read it, so why bother... yanno? oh well, it can be my personal journal, that no one has to read. yay,
soooo...
you like stuff?
hhaahahhahahaha.
hmmm.. i got my liscence, is that how you spell it Sam!? haha. i cant spell for shit. oh well.
i need to quit smoking. its bad for you. im starting to realize that alot. i cough up flem every two seconds, and those stairs at school, damn, when i am climbing them from the library to the 3rd floor, its tough man, lemme tell you!
Prom was last Saturday, it kinda sucked, but after at Amanda's house was kick ass. totally. two words... DOCTOR HUUUUKA!!!!!!
hahha.
ok, i got drunk last night at amandas, and well, i puked everywhere lol. and my mom knows too, shes still rippin.
meh. schools almost over, thank GOD for that.
haha, that reminds me of NO ARMS JESUS! oh god, when i saw that, i was laughinnnnnnnnnn.
haha. haha. hah.....
ok, time for shower, so talk to yalls lataaaaa.
<3 Kari Marie. |
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| For as much as I love Autumn, Im giving myself to Ashes... |
[Mar. 6th, 2005|06:57 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  crushed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Michael... singing to me. | ] |
thank you to the people who are there, for you people that arent, FUCK YOU ALL!
Kari is in the worst mood of her life right now, and has had the worst day EVER.
"I can see the fire in your eyes, the sun exploding in the distance, I knew the world was over, I knew my dream was over..."
Thanks so much... you know who you are.:-)
oh yeah... fuck bitches.
</3 |
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| Call me a safe bet, I'm betting I'm not... |
[Feb. 22nd, 2005|07:17 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  awake | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Fault and Fracture- Converge | ] |
howdy neighbors. ok, things are real fucked up for me right now. i dont know what to do anymore, with myself, family, friends, relationships, and so on... i hate feeling like i have no control, i mean, even when i have sex, i am in control. it sucks baaad. I would like to say, cavour, and shawn malloy makes my heart smile. me being at that show, and seeing some of my friends make music, and make it sound hot, it was just great. im really glad that i got to hang out with shawn malloy, tall steve, and erica the other night, it was a good time. we went to taco bell and got a mother fucking chalupa. haha. on to other news. mike flood doesnt really talk to me as much, and ive been hanging out with scott alot more. i really like him, and the age thing that i was talking about before doesnt really bother him as much. last night, we went to this like 40 year olds house and just chilled. this guy was cool shit. i mean real cool shit. we were watching movies with this other guy my dads age, and i had a good time. i mean, i didnt know that hanging out with people older than me, and when i say older, i mean like old older, could be fun. but it was. we were gonna smoke some pot, but we ended up just going back to my house, and watching the simpsons and such. i got my prom dress today at this place called angeliques in tsongas, or something like that, its like by boston, kinda. lol. but its hot, and as soon as i get a pic of it, ill post it up here, so my homedoggies can see what it looks like. on to cigarette number 3. i went tanning today. i got burnnnnnneeeed. real bad.
hmmm... im pissed i cant go to boston tommorrow with amanda, tomas, timmah, and justin. i have a doctors appt at like 830 tommorrow morning. fuckerrrr. this sucks. i hate when i cant make up my mind about shit. i know, i just know that me and mike could never work. theres just this feeling inside me... scott is like so nice to me and shit, and he lives in the next town over, so its easier to see him and shit. bahhhhhh. me = awake as all hell, and i have nothing to do tonight. this is vacation, not kari staying at home writing in her little journal. newports kinda suck. but oh well, its all i could get for now. i want to go back to smoking reds, i love reds... mmm. i love life i guess. im not as depressed as i was before. wow i talk too much sometimes. like now for example. i love gummy bears, im eating them right now, an they are tasty. you know what would be tasty right now. eggplant parm. <333 my fav <333. i really wanna stick to this so called diet i am on. it consists of not eating at all. it would make me lose weight faster, i know this for sure. people who read my journal make me happy, it makes me happy when i get comments, even though i dont get any, because i never write in this thing. im on myspace all the time, so i get my comments there i guess. cheeea boiiii. i like acting black, because i know i cant. lol.
4 cigarettes later. im finally done with talking. hope you like my boring life. feel free to leave me comments please.
shawn malloy i know you are reading this. and i know friendlys wants their cup back. im sorry i was too fucked up to know what was going on. So Sorry, ME LOVE YOU LONG TIME!. hehe. bye byeee.
<3 Karah |
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| Please speak slowly, My heart is learning. Teach me heart-ache, Stop this burning now... |
[Feb. 15th, 2005|07:32 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | sick | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Taking Back Sunday- Ghost Man On Third | ] |
Wow, LONG ASS TIME NO WRITE!
hmm... what to talk about...
well, I have the flu, i think anyway, i was in bed all day sickly.. ewwy. so when my mom got home, she made me some soupies, and I ate it. haha. and then we went to applebees to get more soupies... mmm.. soupies! hehe. So yeah, I like this kid, very verrrry much so. His name is Michael Flood. mmm...
I met up with him at the mall this past saturday, and we held hands. hehe. I was like awww I want this kid so bad. lol. then theres this other kid, named Scott that i like too... but he said i was too young, and shit like that. he just doesnt make me feel the way that mike does. mike makes me feel good about myself. after all, hes my husband. hehe. I LOVE MIKE FLOOD!!!! there i said it. I really do love this kid. =(
I love listening to TBS and SENSES FAIL when im depressed, in this case, ive been listening to alot of both bands. their lyrics really just talk out to you, and speak the truth. also, BRIGHT EYES!!! hahhaahahhahah. "Sunrise... Sunset"... oh man, I fucking love it. hehe.
This is me with the words on the tip of my tounge, and my eye through the scope down the barell of a gun. |
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| Beating Hearts Baby, Baby is this L-O-V-E for real? |
[Nov. 16th, 2004|01:36 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  devious | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Reggie and the Full Effect- Glove | ] |
okay, i wanted to redo this, and see if anything had changed since over the summer...
//10 bands you've been listening to a lot lately
1) brand new
2) bright eyes
3) converge
4) death cab for cutie
5) glassjaw
6) Head Automatica
7) hawthorne heights
8) atreyu
9) gwar
10) taking back sunday
//09 things you look forward to:
1) new boyfriends
2) license
3) new friends
4) prom
5) when i can see my adam again =(
6) PEIRCINGS!!
7) DRIVING GODDAMIT
8)i hope you choke and die...
9) cant think anymore
//8 things you wear:
1) plugs and other peircings
2) hello kitty apparell
3) eyeliner and my bright blue eye shadow, or beckys red.. oo0o la la
4) tight ass jeans
5) tight ass hoodies
6) tight ass band shirts
7) my converse
8) my emo jacket... god its hideous, but i love it
//07 things that annoy you:
1) fuckin skeeters
2) two faced people
3) my bad habits
4) when you sneeze and it gets all over your hand... haha
5) when people make plans with you and then blow you off
6) when i cant breathe underwater... dammit, i wanna breathe!!
7) feeling unwanted
/06 things you say most days:
1) meow
2) hey sweety
3) meow.
4) rawr
5) I'm so tired.
6) fuck
//05 things you do everyday:
1) yell at my mom
2) go to the bathroom
3) go online
4) sleep
5) think a lot
//04 people you want to spend more time with:
1) JEN!
2) Adam =(
3) Maggiful
4) Mander
//03 movies you could watch over and over again:
1) scarface
2) reservior dogs
3) super troopers
//02 of your favorite songs at the moment:
1) Head Automatica- Tara Reid is a Whore.
2) Converge- Jane Doe
//01 person you could spend the rest of your life with:
1) hmmmm... i honestly dont know...
...Yeah, so some answers were different, some stayed the same... werd.
I have absolutley nothing to write about... so Ill be seeing you around.
Peace.
<3333 Karahhhh |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 7th, 2004|05:07 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  calm | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Knife Party- Deftones | ] |
lets see... what has happened in the last however many weeks it was sine i last posted...
moved outta my house for a couple days.. I needed to get away... but now im back. things suck at home yah know? so i lived with my luver beans amanda!!! wooo!! THE BUMPS!! haha, good times amanda.
i got an industrial.. if anyone doesnt know what that is... heres a pic...
hmm... i dunno if that pic worked or not... oh well, if you are gay, you dont know what an industrial is lol. la la la la la la...
I guess thats all for now... ttyl dudes.
<33333 Karrrrrrri |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 21st, 2004|04:18 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | emo | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Camilla Rhodes- Between the Buried and Me | ] |
when things seem to be getting better, they all fall apart. i dont want this journal to be a bitch-fest, so i wont even go into detail, but one person knows right now what the hell is going on, pretty sad huh? i just feel like i cant trust anyone anymore, nothing personal towards anyone, but theres something inside me that makes me sick. its like a sickness Ive never felt before, i mean, i guess Im just trying to say that the people that are there for me, need to be there for me right now, and i cant just like go up to them and say it to their fces, acause im not like that, so im trying to do it more subtally in an entry, because people that know me best are my friends on my lj, so please, this isnt a cry for help, but its something :(
in other news... i have a crush <3 and no, its not who everyone seems to think it is, sorry to dissapoint you boys and girls... la la lalalalalallalaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, i dont even think any of my friends know who this person is, but they do go to hn and mhm... I got a crush on youuuuuu. i keep getting subtle hints that this person likes me back, so i guess well just see what happens duders.
this is me signing out,
<3 Kariful |
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| Ill take you to the top. |
[Oct. 14th, 2004|08:41 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  contemplative | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Senses Fail- Cute When You Scream | ] |
yeah.. Kenny passed away Saturday night... prayers are with him and his family always.. theres a little candle lit vigil at his house when you drive by at night, so whenever i go by, i just say a little prayer for him, i mean, its pretty fucked the way he had to go, hes so fucking young, too young...
Geoffs party is saturday, cant wait till that, the HIVster will attend, later on, when the game goes on, I cant wait to see him <3. I heart the HIVster.. hehe...
its thrusday right now... nothing to do, so im just sitting around, i wanna dye my hair, so im prolly gonna MAKE my mom take me to cvs to get some hair dye, im thinking like real real real dark brown with purple and red highlites... delicious :)
ill ttyl guys.
<3 Kari |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 9th, 2004|10:05 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | crushed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Head Automatica- I shot Andy Warhol | ] |
Im only going to post one thing today, its about this kid I used to know. His name is Kenny. he lives in my town and hes in the hospital for an overdose, last i heard, which was last night around 9:30 pm, that he was on a ventilator in the ICU. so just pray for him and lets just hope he can get through this as quickly as possible...
<3 Karah |
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| Cross Out The Eyes... |
[Oct. 6th, 2004|01:42 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  numb | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Thursday- Ian Curtis | ] |
had another pretty shitty day, but why the hell would i ever have a good day? im just so sick of HN, can i leave.. please! ahhh... ok im done bitching now. my weekend was kickass though, i spent it with good people and it was just a super fun time. werd. then school starts... it just starts when that friggin bell rings. its like the gateway to hell...COMMMENTSSSSSS PLEASE!!!! even though probably no one will...
<3 Karah. |
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| meow mix |
[Sep. 30th, 2004|03:15 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | sick | ] |
| [ | music |
| | transatlanticism- death cab for cutie | ] |
he = love... that is all...
I came home sick from school today... stupid cold... but I shall be back in action tommorrow. people really make me sick sometimes... im not gonna put anyone on shout, but seriously, thank you to the ones who are there for me.
and I leave with this note...LOOOOOOO!
This is me with the words on the tip of my tounge, and my eye through the scope down the barrel of a gun, remind me not to ever think of you again... |
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| I LOVE MIKE HE IS AMAZING! |
[Sep. 24th, 2004|04:02 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  dorky | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Handguns and Second Chances- Senses Fail | ] |
 yay for Mike acause he made my LJ purrrrrrty... YYYYAAAAAYYY <3333333
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|
| (no subject) |
[Sep. 23rd, 2004|05:36 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  pissed off | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Foo Fighters- Times Like These | ] |
thats it, im done with this bullshit, im done with friends, im done with boyfriends, im done with it all. i casnt stanbd it anymorel dlkvdsjkbvSJ fslvfsjk v.....
this is what it leads me to.. me going to fucking counseling to deal with this bullshit becuase all of YOU people make me this way. fuck all of you.
goodbye to you all. and hello to the ones who are there for me, you know who you guys are, but the rest of you, seriously, you see me in the fucking hallway, look in the other fucking direction and keep on walking, and if i even once here my name come out of your mouth again, ill know that you havew to like me, cause why the hell else would you talk about me so goddamn much. yep. fuck you.,... "I love your new hair omg i love it soooo much"... ten minutes later... "I cant stand the bitch".... wtf is that shit?!?!?!?!
seriously get a fucking life and stop t6alking about mine. bye now |
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| he said I am but one small instrument. |
[Sep. 21st, 2004|01:11 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | contemplative | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Goodbye Sky Harbor- Jimmy Eat World | ] |
contrast and compare between the busy ones
and the ones that don't care
until there is no one that you really know
so i drift through these days of appointments and promises made
they will all end up broken and quickly replaced.
weeks are slow, days drag on;
even practice and parties seem long
but i found myself going
i guess there's nothing to do
oh well
group of kids, line of cars,
more will show up after the bars close
there's this boredom that drowns everything.
bottles break, music plays, conversations competing for space
i look for a corner or a quieter room
there's no heat in this house
i can't breath with these words in my mouth
but i'm not going to say them
yeah, i've made that mistake before
on the stairs, she grabs my arm, says whats up,
where you been, is something wrong?
i try to just smile, and say everything's fine.
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afterthenight's journal
curious
cranky
